Monday, February 09, 2009

Kissing

Been down to the livestock market in Welshpool this morning, where a group of hill sheep farmers and I were in conversation when the subject of kissing came up. In part this could have been in response to today being the beginning of International Flirting Week, with its natural climax on St Valentine's Day this coming Saturday. Or it could have been all the publicity being given to research carried out at Layfayette College, Pennsylvania and Rutgers University, New Jersey. There was a general view amongst us that kissing is the 'must-do' activity for this week.

The human body is a complex creation. (I use this word deliberately). A simple meeting of lips unleashes a chemical surge into the brain which stimulates excitement, happiness and relaxation. Apparently its to do with oxytoxins and cortisol. The more passionate the kiss, the more intense is the consequent stimulus. And it seems that things get even more heated if there's an exchange of spit, which is thought to trigger hormone release and enhanced arousal by the exchange of sexually stimulating pheromones. The research also informs that 'cold' kissing doesn't work so well for women as men. For maximum impact on women the research recommends soft lighting and gentle music. One of the boys, who doesn't have much time for academia said that he finds a bottle of wine to be effective with what he termed 'difficult cases'. Kissing also seems to be an efficient way of spreading germs, and boosting internal body defence systems. There was agreement amongst we sheep farmers today, that we didn't need American academics to tell us most of this.

One kiss, whatever its intensity is fairly harmless. Trouble comes because one kiss can so easily lead to another - and before you know it, the 'pheromone boost' is more out of control than Gordon Brown's financial stimulus. Shakespeare got it right. "Sin from thy lips? O trespass sweetly urged! Give me my sin again." Romeo said that - and we all know how he finished up.

And you thought St Valentine's day was about romance!

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Come on Glyn, who was describing the difficult cases? I would have watched the Landrovers and trailers coming home with great care if I had known you had been having such interesting chats in the Smithfield!

Anonymous said...

OK - OK ... if Matt Withers reads this -

the waters in Montgomeryshire are fine **stop**

can't speak for waters of the Taff *stop*

but can 'recommend' that Matt Withers partakes of said Taff waters *stop*

following extensive water treatment *stop*

STop Me If you CAn said...

"The human body is a complex creation" *stop*

But the solution to the Welsh economic crisis is a simple one *stop*

Read Dr. Wood's letter in Wales's only national newspaper (Western Mail) *stop*

Anonymous said...

I wouldn’t give much credence to the knowledge of Welsh hill farmers on kissing, I didn’t think they went in for that sort of thing, they are just as bad as the welsh tups they breed, talking of which, we’ve had our first lamb this morning, 7/8 weeks early. I’m not sure which field she was in back in September but a ram has been and gone before I’d noticed. Not much time for kissing there.

Glyn Davies said...

Anon - I think he drives a lorry

Anon 2 - Lets hope Matt missed it.

Anon 3 - Why do you assume that it was he who snook through the hedge to pleasure the ewe. It may well have been the ewe that was tempted to stray. In my experience, if a Welsh Mountain ram had found his way through the hedge, you would be the proud owner of several more lambs.