Thursday, September 27, 2007

Training my Eyebrows

I don't think we should lightly pass over the musings of Dr Andrew Clark, a psychologist at Bristol University who has been doing some research into flirting. He's discovered why 'cads' seem to pull what one rather uncouth friend of mine refers to as 'Top Totty'. Research has shown that they use facial gestures to mask the true caddishness of their natures. We who have honest faces and nothing to hide tend to be left just looking on enviously from the touchline.

However, it seems that women like all this facial 'movement' only if they are looking for what we might call a short term relationship - like one night! They see 'vigour and self confidence' which is great in the short term. They probably want 'obedience and subservience' when looking for a longer term relationship.

Now I've always reckoned that Mrs D is bound to come under the heading 'Top Totty' in anybody's language. So I've been thinking how I managed to pull it off all those years ago. It must have been something to do with the way I used to turn up to meet her after the match on a Saturday with my face split and bruised, eyebrows warped and nose out of line (I was always the 'enforcer', which every rugby team has). I must have been irresistible. And when the season came to an end all the twitching stopped and I looked like a good long term bet. Upon such things are such big personal decisions taken.

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